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Weekends can be a challenge when you have ADHD. This might sound counterintuitive; after all, 2 
leisurely days sounds easier and more fun than a busy work week.
However, during the week, there is a natural routine and rhythm. You go to work, head to the gym or do after work activities, have supper, watch your favorite show and then it’s bed time.
When the weekend arrives, that structure and external accountability disappears. You might have been looking forward to the weekend all week. Yet now that it’s here, instead of feeling happy and relaxed, you find yourself feeling lethargic, depressed and unmotivated. You mope around for 2 days and then ping, Monday morning arrives and you feel alive and in go mode again.
Why does this happen?
Well, the ADHD brains needs a certain level of stimulation. Without it you slip into that low energy, flat mood and bored state. Once you are there, it is hard to get out of as nothing seems interesting to you.
The opposite of this blah mood is to feel energized and mentally alert. When you have stimulating and interesting things happening, your executive functions in the brain snap into place, and your brain works super well.
Our bodies and minds need some time to relax and recharge in order to be physically healthy, which means you don’t want to have an action-packed weekend and feel exhausted on Monday
How do you have a relaxing but stimulating weekend?
The answer is a semi-structured weekend!
Having some structure allows you to appreciate your downtime without slipping into the lethargy.
It is a combination of activities with other people, time to take care of necessary activities like housework and some downtime to relax.
For example, you might have a weekly brunch date with friends on Saturday morning and a Sunday morning run with your running club. Those activities are preplanned and give you a framework to hang other activities. After brunch you might find yourself running errands since you are out of the house already. After your run, you might be feeling energized so you can do a load of laundry, including the running clothes.
There is still time to do chillaxing activities, however, don’t leave those to chance. During the week keep track of things that capture your attention. If a movie looks interesting, write it down. If there is topic you want to research on the internet, write it down too. When you have some free downtime and wondering what to do you can look at your list. Don’t wait till you get into that low grade depressed state. Start your activities before that happens.
Be careful! On this activities list do not include things that feel like work, such
as decorating, taxes or, decluttering. Those items do need to be taken care of; however, they don’t count as fun things. If you include those items, you could find yourself going into procrastination mode and end up feeling bad about yourself.
Introverts might be tempted to skip socializing time. However, social contact is an important component of escaping the weekend blahs. If you are an introvert, it is still recommended to have some social time, just make it a short visit with a positive person that you genuinely love spending time with.
Wishing you a very happy semi-structured weekend! How are you going to spend yours?
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I recently discovered that leaving the HVAC fan on the “on” setting all night vs auto setting results in much sounder sleep for me. MUCH! I used to have a very hard time waking up, so on weekends I’d sleep in off until 9:30 a.m. or even later, which means my day really wouldn’t start until noon or later. I now have a ton more energy and get a lot more done and I’m so much happier and feel better about myself! I had no idea the fan was causing micro-awakenings all night, robbing me.of refreshing REM sleep. I work much better Monday through Friday as well. This is an amazing change for me. I’m very grateful!
Another brilliant and really helpful article. Am going to keep a little box of notes of all those things I think of doing when I need to be doing something else and then forget I can do when I have downtime.
Thanks so much for all you do, Jacqueline – your work has helped me so much and just makes me feel like things are actually possible. So grateful 🙂
I am glad you brought this up! I always groan at holidays and weekends when no one will “play” with me! People are taken aback when I remark that holidays are not good for me or weekends where everyone is gone.
So; I do the things I need to do- tomorrow is World Collage Day and I am hosting and putting it forth for my tiny island to be a part. I am hoping for a good turnout with people of all ages and; with artists coming in to shake up their practices! I will bring in my chemicals for photography and show cyanotypes along with collages. Sundays I try to be in the darkroom for a few hours. Otherwise, it is working on stacking 3 cords of wood for the winter!
Staying fit and mentally stimulated is the key to surviving downtime of others. As an artist- athlete I do not have much downtime except for doing my art and allowing my mind to focus. Reading all the time for new ideas is utmost and, at night for excellent authors is most relaxing to enter into different worlds. To maintain a routine for every day is essential.
Same here, the key is routine and schedule (although scheduling can be monotonous). Thats why if you can set up your calendar to repeat things it really helps. For me at least when I have to type in an event that I know, “I probably will do” it becomes a question of how much I want to bore myself typing it out. I recently set aside some time and did this….cant comment on the results yet. Also making plans with friends AHEAD of time can do wonders for that uplifting feeling. A few things I do is go to websites and incorporate their calendar into my google calendar…I believe it is called ical (or internet calendar)…no typing ha ha!
Good ideas! I veg out and read whenever I can. .guess I need to set a schedule to take care of those nagging tasks. Thx! =)
Hi Heather, great idea to schedule your tasks and then you can read as a reward. Plus, when you do read you can do it without feeling guilty about looming tasks. By the way, reading is a wonderful and healthy way to relax!
I definitely get the weekend blahs. Like your article suggests, I made myself a loose weekend schedule last year. Every Saturday I go to brunch. That small routine works wonders for me. I look forward to saturdays, and morning brunch gives me purpose and direction in my day.
Wow! Yes! This is exactly how I feel! I never made the connection between the lack of structure and my recently diagnosed ADHD though. Thank you!
I’ve recently recognized that I do need some time each day where I can “aimlessly do whatever comes to mind.” However, two whole days is apparently way too much. I do have some structure with church on Sundays, but I probably do need more–much more. I need to spend some time thinking about this now and what I can institute to help here. Thanks again!
Hi Ricky
So happy to hear this article helped. I love that you know each day you need some ‘“aimlessly do whatever comes to mind” time. Its important to refuel your mental batteries. Let me know what other planned activities you decide to do along with Church.
warmly
Jacqueline