Maintaining a happy, healthy, long-term relationship is not alway easy. Plus when one or both of you has Adult ADHD, there is a unique set of challenges. However, it is possible to have incredibly fulfilling and happy relationships where you both experience love and joy every day.

Here are 7 Do’s and Don’t for a happy relationship.

1. Do remember your partner’s good qualities. What were the characteristics that you fell in love with? Their energy, love of life, sensitively, kindness, adventurous spirit, sense of humor, love of knowledge, creativity, passion? It is easy to forget these things during day-to-day life. But these are the important things, because you don’t fall in love with someone because they have a tidy sock drawer.

2. Don’t internalize your partner’s actions and think their behaviour is because they don’t care or don’t love you. ADHD Adults are sensitive people and love to please the people they love. If they show up late, or appear distracted during a conversation it’s not done out of disrespect or lack of love for you.

3. Do inform yourself. Read at least one ADHD book so that you have some insight and clarity about what ADHD is. It’s a step that partners often don’t do, yet it will make a huge difference to your happiness and the health of your relationship.

4. Don’t get into the role of being the ‘super coach’ for your partner. It’s not your  responsibility to micromanage your loved one’s every move. This will make you both feel stressed and the relationship very uneven. You will feel like you have a child rather than a wife/husband.

5. Do sit down together and write a list of all the household tasks, from money management to putting out the recycling. Then decide who will be responsible for what task based on who enjoys or is good at each task rather than male/female stereotypes.

6.Do hire a cleaner. Arguments and bad feelings about household cleaning just aren’t worth it.

7.Do have a hobby or activity that you both really enjoy doing together. It will help keep you connected and having fun together. This in turn spills into all areas of your life.



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