Your Body and Self-Esteem

How you take care of yourself and your body is very telling of your self-esteem. If you abuse your body in any way, with food, drink or drugs it could be a sign of low self-esteem. This is where the phrase ‘fake it till you make it’ is perfect. You don’t have to wait until your self-esteem is higher to stop abusing your body. Start to treat it beautifully now and your esteem will rise. Nourish your body with healthy yummy food; give yourself permission to buy the strawberries, even if it isn’t a special occasion. A glass of wine with dinner or a cold beer on a hot day is great, but everything in moderation. It’s easy to wash down the stresses of the day with large quantities of alcohol but it’s not a good way to appreciate your body. If you take drugs to feel ‘normal’ there are lots of others ways to do that than to harm your body in this way.

When you start to take care of and appreciate your body, you will notice lots of many nice rewards. You will have more energy, both mental and physical. You will feel happier on a daily basis, and a sense of peace, because as much as one part has enjoyed the drink, drugs or extra food,  the other part of you was feeling guilty and knew it wasn’t a good thing.

A great way to appreciate your body is to find an exercise that you love to do and then do it every day. Not only will you start to feel healthier and notice physical changes in your body when you exercise your body naturally craves healthy foods and water and so it makes moving away from the unhealthy substances much easier.

Start to take care of your body today and notice how much better feel about yourself inside and out.

Adult ADHD

adult adhd.thumbnailAdult ADHDThe general public is often surprised to learn about Adult ADHD. While most people are aware children have ADHD, they don’t realize it also affects adults. One third of children with ADD do grow out of it, while the rest of the population carry ADHD into adulthood.

Information on ADHD is growing all the time, and since little was known about it 30 years ago it is understandable why many adults didn’t realize they had it until adulthood.

A common way adults discover they have ADHD is that their school-aged child is diagnosed with ADHD. The parent then realizes that the ADHD characteristics that their child is presenting with are also characteristics that they also have . This leads them get an official diagnosis too.

Another group of adults realize that they experience challenges in life and they feel different from everyone else. After doing some research, stumbling across an article or hearing a snippet on the news about ADHD symptoms they will promptly get a diagnosis.

Reactions to discovering you have ADHD vary dramatically, but usually fall into 2 groups. Some adults feel very relieved finally they understand why they are the way they are.Others feel angry that it took them so many years of struggling with life before they realized what it was it. Usually whatever the initial reaction, everyone wants the same thing  which is to learn how they can live their best life.

Some adults have known since childhood that they have ADHD. However what they are now experience are different challenges. Learning skills on how to do well in school, are now replaced with the need to learn how to do well in a work environment, manage a household and take care of finances etc.

While there is often much negative thinking around Adult ADHD, there are also many wonderful gifts too. Once some of the negative aspects are managed ( which can do done with or without medication) then your wonderful gifts can shine through. This blog is a great place to learn about Adult ADHD as well as how to mange it and lead and full, rich and joyful life.

Adult ADHD Symptoms

717339 brain in handAdult ADHD Symptoms

The official  definition of ADHD is described as a “Disruptive Behavior Disorder” where high levels of inattention, hyperactivity or a combination are constantly present in an individual.  Adult ADHD symptoms are different to that of a  child with ADHD. However please don’t be scared, the official term sounds MUCH worse than reality.

Here are 5 key ADHD symptoms that adults with ADHD experience:

1. Inability to Concentrate.

Lack of concentration has many implications. For example, losing track of conversations can mean important information is missed. Distractedness has implications at work and study. As well as missing information, you can experience resistance to things that need a deep level of concentration. This trait can cause tension in relationships as people can misinterpret it as lack of interest.

2. Lack of organization

Problems in planning tasks, personal organization and time management can result in labels being given such as “lazy” or “lacking in self-discipline” and “disorganized”. Often arriving late, hurried and ill-prepared, over committing and leaving tasks unfinished, the sufferer may feel unorganized and overwhelmed with resulting low self-esteem. ADHD adults find it hard to set up and stay with a routine.

3. Poor memory and Forgetfulness.

Memory and forgetfulness  can result in important possessions, such as passports, wallets and purses, laptops and palm pilots being lost or misplaced. Attending meetings, appointments and lectures punctually can be a real problem; sometimes they can be forgotten altogether.

4. Confusion and trouble thinking clearly

Adults with ADHD find it hard to perform up to their intellectual capability. There are difficulties with intense learning situations such as lectures and in-depth reading. There can be errors in spelling and math. Because of the tendency to become side-tracked, information can go unseen, resulting in mistakes at work. Often it can be difficult to maintain a job.

5. Depression and low self esteem.

Because the world is set up for people without ADHD, life can be challenging, and depression, anxiety and low self-esteem are often features in a person with ADHD.

As you are reading this list of ADHD symptoms please don’t feel depressed. There are many ways to manage your symptoms and lead a rich and wonderful life and this blog has lots of great ways to do this.

A Simple Yet Effective Business Tool

538127 spiral bound notebook 1A Simple Yet Effective Business Tool

What simple tool do both business coach and ADHD coach recommend to get projects completed?

In a recent conversation with my good friend and expert business coach Marcia Hoeck, we realized that we both use the same tool to help our clients to take action and complete projects. Can you guess what that is? Write lists! In the 21st century it’s hard to believe that something so simple can really be that effective, but it is.

Adults with ADHD find starting and carrying out projects from start to finish challenging. Often, the very thought of starting on a big project is very daunting and anxiety provoking, so it never gets started. A simple way to stop the procrastination and overwhelm is to write a list of all the steps.  Take a simple piece of paper and pen and write down all the steps that you can think of.

For example if you wanted to write a book, your list might look something like this:
1)      decide on a topic for the book.
2)      brain storm content ideas
3)      organize information into chapters
etc…

You might not know all of the steps at the start of the project, but once you start working on the tasks new information appears and the additional steps become more clear. If one of the steps on your list still feels daunting, then that is a sign that the step can be broken down further still.

When you have your list, you can type it up on your computer, stick it on the wall, or another safe place where you won’t lose it and then start on the first step. Once you have completed the first step you will feel so good and that ‘feel good factor’ will propel you forward to take action on the next step.

Because so many people with ADHD are entrepreneurs, Marica Hoeck and I have a website dedicated to this topic. Check it out at http://www.workingwithadhd.com/

Ten Reasons to Set Goals when you have ADHD

goalsettingTen Reasons to Set Goals when you have ADHD

Goal setting is a wonderful tool for adults with ADHD as this keeps you focused on what is important in your life.

Without goals your natural default position is to be fighting fires every day and you lose control of your time. Here are the top ten reasons to set goals when you have ADHD

  1. Setting goals puts us in the driver’s seat of our lives.
  2. Goals allow us to live our best life, since they encourage us to stretch ourselves and reach your potential
  3. You can accomplish much more when goals are set. Projects are completed quicker, and you can accomplish much more of them!
  4. Goals inspire us and propel us into action
  5. Setting goals is fun and exciting. It is exciting to think what is possible, and to challenge ourselves.
  6. By setting external goals, we also develop internal characteristics and skills, which stay with us long after the goals, have been achieved.
  7. Setting goals and reaching them increases our sense of self-esteem.
  8. Goals keep us going through the less interesting tasks. Even when a task is dull and tedious, we still feel the desire do it because we know it’s part of a bigger picture.
  9. Goals give our life clarity and meaning. They keep us focused on what is most important, and help us to minimize distractions.
  10. When a goal is achieved, nothing can beat the sense of accomplishment. We really need to enjoy the feeling and celebrate the victory, since we can draw on this wonderful feeling when we are working towards our next goal!!

Housework and ADHD

adhdhouseworkHousework and ADHD

 

If you would like to listen to this week’s article, click here.

When you have ADHD, one of the worst tasks imaginable is… housework. Not only is it boring and mundane, it also provides ample opportunity for procrastination and distraction to take place. What could be a two-hour cleaning spree could take all day. However, even though housework, such as cleaning and tidying, taking the trash out, etc. is not a pleasant prospect, it does need to be done, both from a health and safety standpoint, and for your mental and emotional well-being. You feel much better when you have a clean and tidy house. So how can you make it more interesting and even fun? Below is a winning formula!!!

  1. Get a piece of paper and a pen and write down every room that needs attention. For example:
    • Bedroom
    • Bathroom
    • Kitchen
    • Living Room

    You don’t need to write down what you need to do in each room as that will be obvious once you are there.

    By each room on your list, write down the number 10. (This stands for ten minutes.)

  2. Now go to the first room on the list, set your timer for 10 minutes and blitz. Do what needs to be done. It could be changing the linens on the bed, putting clothes away, vacuuming, etc. Start and then keep moving until the timer rings and the 10 minutes is up. A golden rule is don’t leave the room you are working in (even for a second) during those 10 minutes. If you find an item that belongs in another room, put it by the door to be moved when the 10 minutes is up. This keeps your mind focused on the tasks in hand and minimizes the risk of distraction.
  3. When the timer goes off, stop what you are doing, even if you are in the middle of a task. This might be hard because our mind craves completion. However, it’s because you DO stop and move from room to room that you remain motivated and energized. This is why this technique works so well. When the timer goes off, put a line through the 10 for the room you have just finished and then move to the second room.
  4. Do the same for each room on the list. This technique is so powerful that it keeps you on your toes. 10 minutes does not allow you to get bored. It creates a sort of race between you and the timer and keeps you motivated to keep going and not procrastinate.
  5. When you have finished all the rooms on your list (maximum 5 rooms), have a mini break. Drink some water and then start again at the beginning of your list and spend another 10 minutes in each room. By then you should have 5 clean and shiny rooms.

When you have finished, sit down for a rest and a cup of tea and flip through a magazine as a treat… you earned it!!!

ADHD Behaviours…procrastination

Procrastination is one of the key ADHD behaviours and one that most adults with ADHD would love to combat.  Life is full of exciting choices. It’s easy to get distracted and do the fun, enjoyable tasks, and leave the boring or difficult ones for tomorrow. The problem is that every day there are new enjoyable things to do and tomorrow never comes.

The upside of procrastination is that when we decide, consciously or subconsciously, to leave the task for another day, we feel relieved because we don’t have to do that task, at least for the moment.

Unfortunately, there are multiple downsides to procrastination. There’s anxiety of feeling overwhelmed with so much to do and no idea of when we will have the time to do everything. Our confidence is reduced as we feel we can’t depend on ourselves. Then there is negative self-talk when we remember all the tasks we keep procrastinating on, like “I am so bad!” or “I never get anything done.” Negative self-talk in the long term is probably the most damaging effect of procrastination, because it will eventually lower our self-esteem.

In contrast, the sense of accomplishment we experience when we finish a task is huge! This energizes us and we want to do the next task on our list.

The tasks we have been putting off are rarely as difficult or time-consuming as we think. The anxiety that we create by not working on the task is far greater than actually doing the task.

Don’t worry it is possible to combat one of the key ADHD behaviours,procrastination. Here is a nine-step Anti-Procrastination ACTION PLAN to gently, but effectively, help you blitz through all your procrastination items.

  1. It may be helpful to group similar tasks together such as phone calls, paper work, odd jobs around the house, etc.
  2. Post your “Ultimate To Do List” on a wall where you will see it often and make sure that it is dated. This will serve as an excellent baseline to measure your progress. Have a red pen close by to put a line through every task that you complete.
  3. Now look at your “Ultimate To Do List” and decide which five tasks you are going to work on first. You might choose the most pressing five tasks, the five tasks that are going to be achieved most quickly, the five tasks that seem the most appealing, or the five least appealing tasks. It does not matter how you select them. The main thing is to just pick five tasks.
  4. Write these five tasks down on a separate list.
  5. Now grab your kitchen timer and set it for five minutes. Use these five minutes to create your ACTION PLAN for your first five tasks. If a task looks overwhelming, then break the task into smaller steps so it won’t seem so daunting. Also, think of what materials you might need – telephone number, a garbage bag, etc. This step is to help you break the resistance you have been feeling towards the task.
  6. You have now created your fully detailed ACTION PLAN. Start working on the tasks.
  7. Talk kindly to yourself. Give yourself encouragement along the way, until the task is complete.
  8. Celebrate a job well done. Pat yourself on the back. Feel the energy that this accomplishment gives you!
  9. If you have time, go back and repeat steps seven to nine, otherwise do this process again tomorrow.

You will find it fun to see your “Ultimate To Do List” shrinking! Good luck and enjoy the process!