Archives for January 2016

Will My Child Inherit ADHD?…And more!

Jacqui on about.comHere is a roundup of my latest 6 articles on About.com as their ADD and ADHD expert! You could read them all, or pick the ones that sound the most interesting to you.

Will My Child Inherit ADHD?

If you are a parent diagnosed with ADHD a big concern is ‘Will my children have ADHD too?’ Here are 3 suggestions to help in this stressful time

Click here to read the full article.

Book Review. Natural Relief for Adult ADHD

Book Review of ‘Natural Relief for Adult ADHD’ author Stephanie Sarkis looks at complementary ways to treat and manage your ADHD

Click here to read the full article.

How to Deal With Boredom When You Have ADHD

Boredom is one of the things people with ADHD fear the most and will go to great lengths to avoid it. Here are 3 tips to avoid boredom.

Click here to read the full article.

Help! My Partner has been diagnosed with ADHD

If you are struggling with your partner’s ADHD diagnosis, here are the answers to 3 common questions.

Click here to read the full article.

Why didn’t I know my child has ADHD?

When a child is diagnosed with ADHD, parents wonder why they didn’t notice ADHD symptoms before. Here are 5 reasons.

Click here to read the full article.

 

 

Do You Sabotage Yourself Like This Too?

flower-767599_640When you are treating and managing your ADHD, it will almost certainly involve you making some lifestyle changes. Perhaps changing the way you eat, exercising every day, and taking an omega 3 supplement, going to bed before midnight, etc.

When you make those changes, an interesting phenomenon happens.

1.     You feel excited and proud of yourself because you are consistently taking actions that help your ADHD.


2.     These new habits help your ADHD. You feel more in control, less frazzled and able to focus and concentrate more. High fives!


3.     You start to worry about how other people are able to manage their ADHD.

 Concerns about how other people manage their ADHD vary, but here are some common ones.

 

·  Its fine for me, but what about the moms with small children? How would they have the time to do this?

·  I can do this because I make a good income, but what about the people with ADHD who dont make as much money as me?

·  I am lucky because I have a supportive partner; but what about people who are single? How do they do this?

·  I have an understanding boss. But what about those people who have strict bosses? How do they keep their jobs?

 Even though you are a kind person and care about others, these worries arent about anyone else, it is about you. Its a clever way to sabotage your success.

Let’s take an example of Ken (not his real name). He tried many times to exercise on his own and as a last resorthired a personal trainer. It worked! Ken was thrilled about being able to exercise regularly, his annoying ADHD traits reduced, he lost weightso he was on cloud nine. Then, 3 months later, he stopped working with the trainer. He told himself that other people with ADHD couldn’t afford a trainer, but they still managed to exercise; so he should be able to as well. Ken hasnt been back to the gym since.

Kens story is a classic example of this selfsabotage behaviour. Because you arent use to feeling calm and organized, you feel guilty, selfish or that you dont deserve to feel this good. You create a way to bring yourself back to your comfort zone of being disorganized. Gay Hendricks calls it an “Upper Limit problem.

Those people who you imagine, dont actually exist. Everyone has a unique situation. So the chances of someone having the exact situation as you, with the additional problems that you are imagining, are highly improbable.

Also, dont presume the way that works for you and your ADHD would work for everyone.

In Kens case, training with a personal trainer solved his problem of exercising regularly. However some people love exercise so much, they cant wait to get to the gym. Others would much rather go to a Kung Fu class or exercise alone than work with someone one-to-one.

If you have found something that works for you, keep doing it!!! Recognize those thoughts and worries for what they are:  Self Sabotage. Stopping something that works for you doesn’t help those ‘moms with young children, etc.  All it does is stop you from treating your ADHD and reaching your potential.

 

 

Does ADHD Ever Go Away?

CarIf you are diagnosed with ADHD, it’s something you have for life. This might seem like bad news if you are struggling right now. However, it doesn’t need to be!

Some people manage and treat their ADHD so well; they think they must have outgrown it.

They havent; instead, they created a life that works to their advantage. Problems related to their ADHD are camouflaged so well they seem to have disappeared. For some people, this happened almost by accident, while others worked hard to design their life to suit them.

Here are some tips so that you can do this too!

Work Environment

Your work environment is one of the most important areas of your life, because you spend a lot of your time there. Be sure to match your job to your strengths and personality.

At school, many hyperactive children get into trouble for not being able to sit still and instead, talking to their friends. Working in an office and sitting at a desk for 8 hours would be torture. Yet a sales job where you travel around and visit clients in their offices and no 2 days are the same, would be great because you are getting paid to do what you love.

People with inattentive ADHD often get feedback that they are ‘slow’ and take too long to perform a task. Rather than having a job where speed is required, work somewhere that your pace is seen as an asset. Instead of criticism, you would hear, ‘wow, they are so conscientious and patient; they have all the time in the world for their clients.

Many people with ADHD struggle to wake up in the morning. Instead of working someplace where they start at 7:30 am and being reprimanded for being late, they work at jobs where they have flexi time, or where the work culture starts later and finishes later than the traditional 9-5.

Life style

When you directly treat and manage your ADHD, the symptoms reduce. Daily exercise, eating protein for breakfast and taking Omega 3, getting enough sleep and meditation are all super helpful. The trick to doing these things everyday is either make them so fun you cant wait to do them, or they become so part of your routine, they happen automatically, like brushing your teeth.

People

Spend time with people who think you are awesome! Spend zero time with people who criticize you or put you down. All your life, you might have heard that you were ‘too sensitive for your own good’ or have ‘too much energy’ or ‘ you talk enough for 2 people.

Everything is relative. Rather than hanging out with people that grumble about your energy, spend time with people that are impressed with it or have even more than you do.

I know some people with ADHD who are quiet and find making conversation hard work. Their favourite type of person is someone who loves to talk.

When you are with people who love you just as you are, you will feel more valued and loved. You stop feeling bad about yourself. Then, something really crazy happens! Your ADHD improves!
When you are trying to avoid criticism by being on your best behaviour
, your ADHD gets worse. But when you are relaxed and happy, it improves. Isnt that a silver lining?

Your Mindset

When you are comfortable with yourself and your ADHD
, you dont mind when you make mistakes. You deal with it matteroffactly. If you lose your wallet, you phone the bank and cancel your cards. If you forget where you parked your car, you look for it. You dont get mad about it, or talk to yourself so meanly that it takes weeks to recover. You manage your ADHD, learn strategies and tricks to help you. So then, when something happens, you can trust yourself to handle it and you dont see it as a personal failing.

What do you do that helps your ADHD ‘disappear?’

7 Tips to Avoid Post Holiday Blues

Stocksy_txpa8712e54wpk000_Small_472571There are some people with ADHD who dont like the holidays and cant wait to get back to normal. There are other ADHDers who find the holidays exciting and enjoy every moment; but then, when they are over, they experience a big emotional low.

The build up to the holidays seems to start right after Halloween. So that means 2 full months of parties, shopping trips for presents and outfits, decorations to put up, elaborate cooking and family traditions.
Once midnight has chimed on New Year’s 
Eve, and the popping of corks comes to an end, it is back to normal. Life can feel flat and ordinary.

Many people with ADHD feel depressed after big events or after achieving a goal. The holidays and New Years celebrations are no exception.  It doesn’t help that January is cold dark month and you might have S.A.D.

If you experience an emotional low or depression after the holidays, here are 7 suggestions to stop that from happening… or minimize it.

 1.     Have Something to Look Forward to

Start planning some events to look forward to in January, February and March.
Plan one thing for each month that will take your focus off the ending of the holidays and on the new thing.

2.     Set Goals

Rather than setting New Year’s Resolutions, set goals instead. Having a goal to channel your energy and focus really helps override low moods. It doesn’t matter what the goal is: declutter your home, lose weight, train for a race, or something completely different!

 3.     Tidy Up

Pack all your holiday decorations away. Many people with ADHD procrastinate packing their holiday decorations away and leave them up month after month. Rather than prolonging the holiday mood, it can add to your sadness. Set your timer and put everything away.

 4.     Put Your New Belongings Away

If you have presents or new items from the sales, put them away too. Having clutter lying around increases the risk of depression. You could also donate belongings you dont use; because it creates space and shifts your energy.

5.     Assess Your Life

Often, the people who experience the post holiday slump the most, are the ones who dont enjoy their daily lives. If this is you, what is it about your life you dont enjoy? Your job? Being single? Your commute? Your unmanaged ADHD? Whatever it is, there are ways to improve the situation.  Make a commitment to yourself that you will make big changes to your life this year.

6.     What IIAbout The Holidays You Enjoy?

Another good thing to assess is what is it about the holiday you enjoy? Is it that you get to go out more than usual? Spend more time with your family? Or something else? Next, work out how you can include more of those things in your day to day life.

 7.     Review Your Year

Look at the last 12 months and write down everything you did and accomplished. Think of at least 25 things. If you would like to share them, add them in the comments section below. People with ADHD have a tendency to focus on what they didnt do and that makes you feel bad about yourself. Celebrating your accomplishments, even small ones, makes you feel good about yourself and happy. Happy is a great way to start the New Year!!!!