Archives for July 2009

Book Launch

Book Launch

On May 20th, I had my book launch at Nicholas Hoare bookstore on Greene Avenue in Montreal.

The launch was amazing, a totally A+ experience.

24 hours later my new website and blog caught a nasty virus and were down for nearly two weeks, so I didn’t write about the launch or post any photos. Here is the book launch wrap-up!!

People

A book launch wouldn’t be anything without people! I was so touched by everyone who made such an effort to be there. There were clients past and present, wonderful new people that I met for the first time, and of course, all of my close friends.

Book Launch

Location

The bookstore, Nicholas Hoare, is a beauty. There are three Nicholas Hoare bookstores in Canada named after the owner… Nicholas Hoare. A fellow Brit, Mr. Hoare wanted to capture the feeling of old English manor house libraries in his stores. That is achieved splendidly both with the décor (the bookshelves are wooden and the walls are green) and atmosphere. There is a magical feeling in the store that is hard to describe, but it is calm and welcoming.

Staff

The staff at Nicholas Hoare were so professional and sincerely friendly and helpful. They did a great job of both pouring wine and selling books!

Book Launch

Food

I had ordered some yummy food, cheese, dips, Hors D’oeuvres and special bread from Premiere Moisson. Most of it was eaten on the night, however, I did get to eat leftover for a couple of evenings after the launch. There is nothing better than leftover party food and a glass of red wine 🙂

Wine

There is a whole story regarding the wine. I wanted there to be lots of food and wine for all the guests, so I got the advice from a friend and successful wedding planner, Ciara Daykin. She and her husband sent me a detailed email of both qualities and types of wine I should offer – two choices of white wine and two choice of red wine to suit everyone’s palette. Three weeks before the big day, I carefully selected the wine from a website that offered delivery. I thought this would save myself from having to lug around heavy boxes of wine. However, the wine did not arrive. Lots of phone calls occurred from Monday to Wednesday (the day of the book launch) inquiring about the whereabouts of the wine. Finally at 4pm, two hours before everyone was due to arrive, it came to light that the delivery wasn’t going to happen. I ran (literally) to the nearest wine store, grabbed a trolley, while trying to remember the contents of Ciara and Simon’s email (but perhaps not fully.) I began to throw 40 bottles of wine in, and personally delivered the wine to the bookstore. Phew, disaster averted.

Book Launch

General Overview

The two hours of the actual launch went so fast. I signed lots of my books and talked to all the cool people who were there. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. I drank one glass of wine and lots of water. (All that talking makes for a dry mouth!) It felt pretty amazing to be launching my book in such a public and grand way and it felt so far removed from me sitting in my bedroom typing on my laptop with Kitty watching. I am so proud of the book and I know it’s helping lots of people with ADHD, which of course was my goal in writing it. One lady with ADHD said, “This book is so helpful, I wish I had read it twenty years ago.” When I get feedback like that, I get goose bumps and a little teary.

AND if you haven’t read my book yet… it’s called Untapped Brilliance: How to Reach Your Full Potential as an Adult with ADHD.

Forgiveness Technique

how forgiveness helps you feel healedAdults with ADHD typically experience more criticism and “unpleasant” situations in their life than their non-ADHD peers. These experiences begin as a child, through teenage years and into adulthood. Not only are these experiences disagreeable at the time, but also the memories of these situations can still affect you years after it occurred. A memory can pop up into your mind while you are driving along, or in the supermarket line. What “Mrs. Smith” said about your Maths when you were eight years old, or the nasty comment Susy (your last, but only girlfriend) said about you.

These seemingly random thoughts can affect you much more than you think. When you remember unpleasant memories from the past, they bring your energy level and mood down in present and affect how you think and feel about yourself today. Ultimately, they affect your self-esteem and confidence.

The best way to take the sting out of these memories is to practice forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean that what was said or done wasn’t hurtful or wrong, However, it does allow you to feel at ease with what happened and allow those memories to no longer effect you negatively.

How do you start practicing forgiveness? Let me first share an amazing but true story that is in Joe Vitale’s book The Attractor Factor.

Dr. Ihaleakale he Len, a psychologist, worked on a ward of which housed criminally insane patients at Hawaii State Hospital. It was a very challenging and dangerous ward and the conditions were so bad that people who worked there usually didn’t stay very long. Because it was so dangerous, people would walk through the ward with their backs against the wall. Yet, within a short time of Dr. Len working there, patients were released from their shackles, their medication reduced and then stopped altogether. After four years, the ward was closed down completely because all of the patients had been released.

This is an extraordinary success story. However, it’s even more extraordinary because Dr. Len didn’t ever meet any of the patients face to face. He merely studied their charts and took a simple yet highly effective action step. While looking at the charts, Dr. Len repeatedly said, “I am sorry,” and “I love you.” Dr. Len was sending positive energy to the patients and it was enough to make a huge difference in their behaviour and life.

The example about Dr. Len highlights how powerful words can be without ever saying them to the person actually involved. When a memory pops up in your mind, say “I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you,” until that memory is no longer emotionally charged. Notice how your feelings towards the person or incident change. They are now a neutral memory rather than a painful one. Notice how great you feel inside. When you make peace with situations like this, you will find they no longer plague you. They get permanently tucked away in your memory vault.

Actions

  1. When a memory of a past situation comes to mind, practice the forgiveness technique.
  2. Say “I forgive you, I forgive you, I forgive you” until the memory is no longer painful.
  3. Remember Dr. Len’s story if you need inspiration.
  4. If you are thinking that this is “too way out there for me,” that’s okay. But try it anyway, purely as an experiment.
  5. Notice how good this technique makes you feel.

Positive Things about ADHD in Adults

bubble-83758_640ADHD in adults can result in you struggling with certain unwanted behaviours, however  ADHD in adults also means good things too! Just like adults who don’t have ADHD, not all people with ADHD have the same talents and strengths. However, there are a group of positive talents that are often seen in people with ADHD and below are five of them. Give yourself credit for the things you do well. This in turn will boast your confidence and self-esteem.

Great Company

The combination of your vibrant energy and sense of humour make you a great person to be around. Friends want to spend time with you and strangers naturally gravitate towards you.

Compassionate

You are compassionate to other people, causes and animals. Your sensitivity helps you to relate because you have less inhibitions than a non-ADHD person. You will be the person who helps a lady with a stroller or speaks loudly to protest against something you believe in.

Impulsivity

Impulsive actions allow you to take action quickly. This allows you to do things that many people think of doing, but by the time they take action, the moment is lost.

You think swiftly and act swiftly. Your impulsivity also means you make decisions quickly, which can be a huge gift, as some people can spend hours agonizing over something that can take you a matter of seconds to decide.

Spirit of Enquiry

You have a spirit of enquiry and love to gather facts on many different subjects. You can hold interesting and informed conversations on a wide variety of topics. Your natural thirst for knowledge keeps you young, whatever your biological age and also makes you an interesting person to be around.

Weakness Can Become Strength

While this article is about celebrating your strengths, sometimes a weakness can become your strength. An example I see quite often is having an organized environment. Some adults with ADHD, once they discover how calm and happy they feel with a tidy environment, become experts at keeping their environment super tidy. They become more efficient at creating and keeping their environment tidy than any person who did have a clutter problem.

This Week’s Actions

  1. Do you recognize yourself in any of the above talents? Just because they come easily to you, remember not everyone has them.
  2. For each of the five points above, ask yourself:
    • Is this a trait I have?
    • When have I noticed/experienced it recently?
    • How could I maximize this trait and use it more to my advantage?
  3. Keep a record of when you feel good about one of your talents, or get positive feedback from another person. You can refer back to it to this list give yourself a lift at times when you aren’t feeling so good about yourself.